The Shop Sells Condoms Of Three Designs!

This is a story that I heard from a dude who heard it from another dude years ago..
I wanna share it with those who haven't heard it..

There was a newly married couple. The wife was okay-looking, and had fair skin. The husband was also okay-looking and had fair skin. So in short, both were okay-looking and had fair skin. Haha.

They were deeply in love with each other, but the husband was always worried. He had a job, but the job wasn't great in terms of salary. What he got was just enough for both of them. They couldn't afford to have kids, yet.

So right immediately after they got married, the husband told his wife that he wanted to buy a condom, as a method to prevent her from getting pregnant. The wife agreed, and he went to a shop.

At the shop, he saw 3 types of condoms. One was black: cost RM0.50, another was white in colour: cost RM1.00, and the last one was black and white striped condom: cost RM1.50. Since he wanted to save the budget, considering that he was having a tough life, he picked the cheapest one: the black condom.

So the husband always used the black condom every time they had an intercourse. And every time after they finished doing it, the husband would wash the condom, clean it and keep it in his wallet, so that he could use it again for the next 'performance'. So in short, he used the condom, washed and cleaned it, kept it in his wallet, and used it again, night after night. Budget of the year.

After a year, the husband got promoted. He happily told his wife about the promotion and said that he needed to go out of town for 3 months. The wife was sad, but had to agree. So the husband went away..

During that period of time, the wife was feeling lonely and horny. She missed her husband so much, but couldn't do anything. So one day, she went to a 'mamak' stall to have breakfast. There was a 'mamak' preparing 'roti canai', with only wearing a 'kain pelekat'. The wife stared at him, and suddenly that mamak's 'kain pelekat' got blown away by the strong wind! (This might sound a bit extreme)

The wife was immediately turned on and asked the 'mamak' to follow her back to her house. The 'mamak' agreed, he said 'wokeh!', and they had a sexual intercourse there. Please be reminded that there was no condom used..since the husband kept it in his wallet and went away...

3 months later, the husband went home, while the wife was pregnant. The husband felt weird and said,

"I thought I used a condom. How can you get pregnant?"

The wife replied,

"Maybe there was a hole on it..you always used the same condom every time."

Then he said,

"Owh..maybe you're right. Never mind, since I'm now a manager, i think we can afford to have a kid."

So they agreed to take care of the kid inside.

9 months later, her water broke, he brought her to a hospital, then poosh! They had a baby boy!

But the baby had dark skin. The husband was dumbfounded, and said,

"How come he has dark skin?? We both have fair skin!"

The wife didn't know what to say...and the husband kept on thinking, trying to find a good explanation for that situation. Then suddenly,

"Now I know why!"

The wife in fear and shock asked,

"Know what?"

The husband confidently replied,

" We got a baby with dark skin because of the black condom! Remember? I always used a black condom!"

In relief, the wife said,

"Ooooo...."

Then he said,

"Thank God I didn't buy the striped one..."

A BLACK HEART IS A BROKEN HEART

Knocking on the door
of a little room,
with the fading light
in the silent gloom,
screaming to be heard,
begging to be pleased,
trying to make a wish

Walking on the bridge
of internal disappointment,
he met those stars of the night
staring down at the stains,
with the one of whom
he thought was right

Searching for the lines
with malice, hatred and wrath,
he smote his entire life
into tiny pieces, criticized,
with the one of whom
he thought ain’t a knife

Though time shall heal and write
what is meant or which is light,
yet,
a black heart is still a broken heart

Rushing around
in the smell of an illusion,
he looked for faith
in faithless absolution,
waiting for changes,
seeking for redemption,
he won’t hide from the truth

Knocking on the door
of a broken heart,
with the fading light
in the darkest part,
insecure

The Sea, The Well And The Knowledge

Close your eyes and think deeply.
Imagine.
You're in the middle of the deep blue sea, so vast. You're swimming against the current, so tiring, so sickening, but you're enjoying every second of it.
You're in the middle of the deep blue sea, so beautiful. You're shouting against the wind, so frustrating, so thwarting, but you're enjoying every second of it.
You're in the middle of the deep blue sea, so thirsty. You're looking for a drink, so dizzy, so silly, this time you're not enjoying it. You want a drink, but you can't get it. You want to drink the water you're in, but...can you? Is the water drinkable?

Keep your eyes closed.
Imagine.
You're standing next to a tiny old well, so small. You're staring down the hole, so shallow, so cheap, you're not enjoying it.
You're standing next to a tiny old well, so dull. You're counting each second that passes by, so boring, so nothing, you're not enjoying it.
You're standing next to a tiny old well, so thirsty. You're looking for a drink, so mortal, so lifeless, still, you're not enjoying it. You want a drink, but you can't find it. You want to drink the water deep in the hole, but..can you? Is the water drinkable?

Is the water drinkable? Is the water drinkable?
The deep blue sea, is the water drinkable?
The tiny old well, is the water drinkable?

The sea is beautiful, so big and full of life, but you can't drink it or it'll make you thirstier.
The well is dull, so shallow and cheap, but you can drink it, it will wash away your thirst.

So, which is knowledge? The sea or the well?
Both are.

But the sea can't help you when you're in need, no matter how hard you try it you won't succeed. While the well will give every single drop of water you crave, just to make sure you're safe.

So which is knowledge?
Knowing loads of things but doesn't help you ever, or knowing just simple things but gives a hand forever?

BETWEEN YESTERDAY AND TOMORROW

You said things would become true,
would bring changes,
would cause happiness,
I put my trust in you,
you failed me

You’ll say things will become real,
will get better,
will last forever,
I want to trust you,
you’ll fail me

TRUTH

Just say the words, let everyone hear
What’s in your mind?
What’s there to fear?
Just tell what’s real, let everyone see
What’s in your heart?
What’s left for me?
Just speak the truth, let everyone know
What’s your feeling?
Why’re you so?
Don’t be afraid, don’t hesitate,
‘cause that is life,
nothing to elaborate
‘cause truth is happiness, truth brings sorrow,
what you do know,
is what is to know

Hidden Definition Of Boredom

Life would mean a lot to us if we've got so many things to do or share, and there's always something new everyday. But the reality is, our lives have their own ups and downs, so to have great things every single day might be just impossible. Because of that, there will be a day or two when we find that life is so boring and wish that we could do something about it.

Boring..bored..boredom..do we all have the same absolute meaning for those words? Perhaps yes, boredom means we've got nothing to do, and if we do have a thing to deal with, it would be the same thing everyday..........

But have we ever realized this one side of perception, which leads us to another meaning of boredom? A hidden one.

Think about this; imagine that your life is full of wars, troubles, arguments, confrontations, and every second you have to face them, deal with them, then you become too busy to even breathe, you're rushing, you're tired, but forced to keep mending all those sickening stuff. You don't even have time to moan and complain!

Then, imagine that your life is so boring, you sit on the couch staring at the wall, you lay yourself down to sleep, but you can't sleep because you've had enough, soon after you walk and stand at the window, thinking what to do, then you eat, drink, take a shit, switch on your TV, the same things being played again and again, and you complain. So boring!

But hey! Don't you realize? You're damn bored, but you ain't got wars, troubles, arguments, confrontations and you're not rushing! You can even breathe! Isn't that beautiful?

Yes, my friend. Boredom on one side, means no killing, no crying, no hurricane or any of the wrath of mother nature, nothing, but peace. Boredom means peace and stay out of trouble. Don't you think so?

Driving: Smoker VS Non-Smoker

When I was in form 4, 16 years old, my English teacher prepared a set of comprehension questions for our test. The article that she chose for us to read was quite informative and interesting, that was why I scored A. Muahahaha! Anyway, that's not the point. The point is, the title of the article was "Driving: Smoker Vs Non-Smoker". (Honestly, I don't really remember the exact title, but this's close to it)

Okay, here's the story. I'm gonna share with you guys in present tense form, because it's easier for me to construct sentences. Haha.

A research has been made and during the process of researching, the researchers prepare three stages to come up with answers of who is better in driving, in a sense of safety, smoker or non-smoker.

FIRST STAGE:

A driving session is conducted and a number of people consist of smokers and non-smokers take part in it. So, they all drive happily and the researchers observe every single aspect of safe driving. You know, seat belt, speed, brake, you name it.
The results? Not too different. Whether they smoke or don't smoke, they can drive safely. So, it's 1: 1 now.

SECOND STAGE:

Still using the same method, driving session..(of course, the title of the article starts with the word 'driving'). But this time, there are obstacles (cone, car etc.) purposely put on the road by the researchers, and the samples (participants) need to drive without hitting any of those obstacles. So again, they all drive happily. Can you guess what the results are? Not too different as well. All of them can avoid hitting the obstacles, and some of the smokers can even do it better than those non-smokers! But that is based on individual experience of driving, the researchers don't count that aspect. So, all proceed to the next stage, and it's 2: 2 now.

THIRD AND FINAL STAGE:

This is the most critical part of the research as well as of the driving aspect. A sudden encounter with an obstacle or more. On this level, the samples need to drive on the road without expecting any obstacles. Yes, the researchers don't tell them that there's gonna be an obstacle during the process. So, the samples get in the car, put on all safety measures and drive. They drive, drive and keep driving, until there's another car speeding towards them all of a sudden. Bang!

Guess what? The non-smokers succeed, while most of the smokers fail and hit the other car unexpectedly! Wow, it's still 2 for the smokers, and it's now 3 for the victorious non-smokers!

So, what do we learn today? Simple, research has proven that people who smoke can drive as better as those who don't smoke, but, when it comes to critical situations where critical and quick solutions are needed, smokers will falter. The smoke that they have been inhaling (including all the chemicals in the smoke) has damage some parts in their brain which control the critical and reflexive thinking..that's all.

So my friends, try your very best not to smoke..a friendly advice from me.

P/S: There's also another research proving that smsing or talking with the phone while driving is as dangerous as driving while you're drunk. But I didn't get the details.

I SEE ONLY ME IN THE STREET OF EMPTINESS

Is it the nature of man?
To see no one else to understand
Is it the nature of me?
To see only me in the street, so lonely, so empty

The shadows of my existence,
resonate indomitable questions,
Where has everyone been?
I can’t see and I can’t feel, oh, it makes me so keen

The moon’s glowing and the street’s bright,
still I’m in the dark and it doesn’t feel right,
my hands reach nothing,
the horror strikes me, I never stop calling

What I should do doesn’t come to show,
there’re so many things I wish to know,
Why am I left alone?
Will this street find me when I’m all gone?

Three Reasons Why We Should Say ‘I Am Sorry’

Life’s not easy and it will never be. That’s why God gives us friends, partners and family for company. Sometimes they make us smile, sometimes they make us cry. Whatever that is, when they’re here, life is always worthwhile. But what about us? What do we do when we weren’t there for them, or when we broke their heart? It’s hard to find a reason to admit that we’ve made a mistake. However, if we think carefully, our judgment, attitudes and words are the solid reasons why we should say ‘I am sorry’.

William Shakespeare once said, ‘There is nothing either good or bad. But thinking makes it so.’ From his words, many people; normal or abnormal, rich or poor, brilliant or dumb, they believe that whatever comes from our judgment does affect our relationship tremendously. Yes, it is our thinking. Sometimes when we think about someone, we see them as what we believe they are. Because of that, we misunderstand and underestimate them. Sometimes we think that they are worthless and only bring troubles to us. Furthermore, if we had bad experience with certain people before, we tend to judge them based on that experience alone and never try to see the good side of them. We never give them a second chance to prove that they have changed. This makes them deserve an apology. Yes, I’ve to admit that I too do this kind of stuff. My bad. Sorry.

Then, here our attitudes make their first debut.Uh huh, attitudes play so many important roles in destroying a relationship. For example, the way we respond to a friend’s joke. Even if the joke isn’t funny enough to make us laugh, it’s okay to smile a bit at least for the effort. But we mock and humiliate them instead. Plus, when we find that we have a different way of life that would never be the same with them, we create barriers in between and treat them with ignorance and prejudice. This always happens in relationships, especially when race and religion take place. So, if we ever do this to anybody, then by now we should have already realized that we must say sorry.

Lastly, the third reason why we should apologize is; of course, our words. In fact, words can be the most suicidal thing in a relationship. We often believe that we have the rights to say out loud what’s in our heart, forgetting the fact that we’re talking to another heart. In a conversation for instance, it is normal to disagree, but it doesn’t mean we should end it with name-calling and foul language. Moreover, we never realize that we might have hurt someone’s feelings when we say without thinking the consequences, especially when it comes to personal appearance in public. For example, ‘Hey, you look fat.’ It may be an ordinary statement that comes out sincerely, but it can be offensive and embarrassing to the ones we are talking to. Funny, I always do that too. I’m sorry.

So, to sum up, we should realize that preserving a relationship is not as easy as creating it. That’s why we must always be aware of our judgment, attitudes and words towards our companionship. Even the slightest tardiness in comprehending their importance can cause turmoil and eventually lead damage to the relationship.

Always remember, discretion is the better part of valour. And hey, this is only an opinion. Don’t use this for your factual studies or assignments. Only a brat would copy and believe that everyone can accept this. Owh, I’m sorry.

So my friends, say sorry!

Is life a toilet bowl?

History would have us believe that man helping another man to live as peacefully as possible would end up called the noble. And those people who make other people happy, smile and laugh would be remembered as the most respected people in the history of man, despite the fact that this kind of people are most probably not very rich, not very intelligent, and not very powerful. Anybody wants to counter-argue? Bring it. I don't care. I'm entitled to my opinions.

But what i'm trying to say is; isn't this kind of life full of shit? Oops, no hard feelings. Consider this one opinion that i'm trying to share. You have 10 dollars, you're going to buy an umbrella with that money, and believe me, it's going to damn rain. Then on your way to the umbrella shop, somebody stops you and says that he needs 9 dollars to buy his medicine (i'm not sure if there is any medicine costs that cheap nowadays). Whatever, my point is, that man tells you that he's gonna die without the medicine (and i'm not sure if there is such a case in the world; a man's gonna die for not taking his 9-dollar medicine), and you believe him, you give away 9 dollars to him, then he says thanks. That's the story; you saved a man's life and ended up getting wet in the heavy rain. You can't buy an umbrella with only one dollar in hands, agree? But hey, you saved a life! Isn't that noble?

Do you see my point? If you were a little bit intelligent, and a bit powerful in controlling your pity for that man, you could have walked away with all the money and save yourself from the rain. Right? But of course, that man would die...because of your 'intelligence' (if he wasn't lying).

So, is that true? In order to become rich and powerful, you have to ignore that kind of man. Is it true that in order to help another man, to be noble, you have to sacrifice things that belong to you? Even though it would cause you trouble and whatnot?

Hey, come on. Life isn't like that! But it is true. Sometimes, to be noble means you've got to be selfless, and take all the shit that goes into your mouth and swallow it so that the owner of the shit would feel happy, relieved and satisfied. Don't say you don't feel happy and satisfied after dumping loads of shit. I do.

So, life is like a toilet bowl. Take all the shit, and make them happy.

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